Findings of empirical research relevant to each theme will be provided in order to buttress or to challenge the commentary within the popular resource. Girls are described as Burton as being more skilled in communication, possessing a greater awareness of their emotions and placing more value on sustained relationships with others There are also discussions related to the influence of hormones and brain development during adolescence which results in misinterpretations of social situations and drastic changes in emotions Burton, The significance placed on the importance and enduring nature of relationships by women is well supported by research on relational aggression Galen and Underwood, ; Coyne et al.
These differences, which logic suggests should result in closer bonds with others, often lead to relationally aggressive behavior, which in turn damages the relationships that females yearn to form and maintain. Women tend to form closer bonds with female friends than do men with their same-sex friends.
The cultural expectations regarding female behavior are explored in detail in popular literature. The idea that overt aggression is discouraged among girls due to gender-related expectations and the fear of losing friendships is also addressed by Burton and is considered a possible motive for relationally aggressive behavior related to the repression of feelings of anger.
The book further explains that these feelings of anger resurface often and result in girls talking to other girls about the person that upset them, which starts relationally aggressive behaviors such as a cycle of gossip and rumors throughout the social group Burton, The empirical literature confirms that males exhibit higher rates of physical aggression when compared to females of all ages Bjorkqvist et al.
While it could be theorized that girls are conditioned to refrain from physically aggressive behavior, there is no empirically derived evidence confirming the significance of such conditioning or that refraining from physically aggressive behaviors results in the expression of anger via relational aggression. Good popularity is described as when a girl is genuinely liked by others because she is pleasant and socially appropriate toward others.
This positive variation of popularity in referred to as sociometric popularity in research literature, and is not linked to relational aggression or to maladaptive social behaviors LaFontana and Cillessen, ; Cillessen and Mayeux, Dellasega also categorizes adult females as Queen Bees , Middle Bees , or Afraid-to-Bees based on their behavior and even provides a self-quiz to help the curious reader identify to which group they may belong The description in this text of the behavioral inventory exhibited by the Queen Bee is entirely consistent with what most researchers describe as relationally aggressive behavior.
Wiseman states that cliques act most detrimentally in sixth, seventh and eighth grades The research on relational aggression and popularity indicates in parallel that cliques or peer groups typically become more of an influential factor during the middle school years. In Mean Girls Grown Up , Dellasega asserts that cliques certainly do not disappear in adulthood; they just become more complex and differentiated with cliques centered at work, at church, within extended families, and even in the PTO or other organizations in which women dominate It is natural for cliques to occur in all settings and stages of life; however, high levels of exclusivity in cliques prompt members to use relationally aggressive tactics to further the values, norms and status of the group.
Crick and Grotpeter found that the friendships of relationally aggressive children were characterized by greater intimacy. While gossiping is not a topic that is specifically addressed in extant empirical literature on relational aggression, it is certainly a relevant theme among adolescent girls and is included in the majority of definitions of relationally aggressive behavior.
Gossiping is addressed by Wiseman in Queen Bees and Wannabes in a manner that encourages parents to recognize that gossip is a reality and, further, the book provides caretakers with advice on how best to handle situations where their daughter is the one talking or being talked about The topic of parenting is also addressed in the popular literature on relational aggression.
She encourages an authoritative parenting style as well as provides advice to parents on how best to encourage open communication. The major motion picture Mean Girls also provides an accurate portrayal of the permissive parenting style that researchers have linked with relational aggression in children. While Burton Girls Against Girls , does not specifically refer to the nomenclature for parenting styles, she does convey that girls may learn to be cruel to one another from older women who have been similarly treated This link between parental relational aggression and the use of psychological control tactics and authoritarian strategies among parents is well-documented in research.
This book outlines the interviews that Barash completed with women from a variety of backgrounds regarding woman-to-woman rivalry. She reports that women are so concerned with competing against other women that they avoid certain social functions in order avoid such rivalry.
Barash states that women seem to compete with other women throughout their lifespan. While the theme of the rivalry changes according to age i.
Differences between male and female rivalry is also discussed in Tripping the Prom Queen Barash, Males are often thought of as the more competitive gender since they are cultured from a young age to believe that winning is most important and, also, since as a gender group they have greater direct involvement in sports. One of the main gender differences, it is explained, is that females compete primarily with other females. Barash explains that women often feel that there is nothing they can do about the success of men.
Also, when women are successful other women regularly respond with envy and jealousy; however, when a woman fails, other women are there to comfort her. While the empirical research literature does not imply that women are significantly more predisposed to engage in unhealthy levels of competition or rivalry, some evidence exists that individuals who have relationally aggressive tendencies are more likely to engage in rivalry or to interpret situations as being oppositional.
Crick and Grotpeter and Crick et al. Thus, individuals who have relationally aggressive tendencies may interpret as a personal threat situations such as a coworker getting a promotion or an acquaintance getting married. This review of popular and research literature has identified several themes about relational aggression that appear in both dissemination formats. In some cases the information presented by popular resources is in accord with the research on relational aggression; however, in other cases, disparity exists between what popular culture and science tells us about relational aggression.
The following synopsis and table delineate the major themes explored in literature on relational aggression and the stance taken by each of popular culture and by science. Defining the construct of relational aggression and distinguishing it from other related terms e.
What discriminates relational aggression from other related forms of aggression is that damage is focused on relationships in order to harm an individual Crick et al. Definitions in both popular and research literature include this element of damage to relationships as the hallmark feature of relational aggression. Science and popular culture both maintain that victims of relational aggression suffer serious consequences. While research literature has established that significant outcomes are endured by both victims of relational aggression and the perpetrators, popular literature focuses predominantly on the negative effects of relational aggression on victims.
Nearly all of the empirical literature and popular treatises on the topic focus on females. While relational aggression certainly occurs in males, science and popular culture have noted and investigated its occurrence among females, perhaps because the effects on females are far more profound and wide-reaching. While relational aggression can start as early in life as preschool and continues throughout the life span, both science and popular publications focus on its occurrence in adolescence.
Some popular books have explored relational aggression taking place in adulthood, but there is very little empirical research available for this age-group. There is, however, research on relational aggression occurring among preschool age children, but popular literature for the most part does not mention young children.
Both science and popular culture recognize that certain parenting styles i. The connection between relational aggression and parenting is likely the reason why so many books on the topic are targeted to parents.
Popular culture depicts females as competing with each other in a variety of domains and settings to a greater degree than males e. Empirical literature on relational aggression, however, does not clearly recognize a greater inclination toward rivalry in women compared to men. Females who engage in relational aggression may be more likely to pinpoint shortcomings in other in an attempt to damage their reputation, but there is no clear-cut evidence suggesting that one gender-group is more competitive than the other.
Research has linked relational aggression with higher levels of social insight and intelligence. There is also research suggesting that children who are relationally aggressive tend to interpret potentially provoking situations in a hostile manner.
While social competence has been covered rather thoroughly in the empirical literature, the connection between social competence and relational aggression is not a topic that is addressed in detail in popular literature. Popular media may mention physically aggressive behaviors as examples of relational aggression, but the association between relational aggression and physical aggression has yet to be developed as an area of focus.
A common thread in all the publications and media describing relational aggression, whether popular or research-based, is the significance of the event in the lives of women. While empirical and popular resources focus on relational aggression occurring at specific ages, the heart-rending stories from adults regarding incidents from their childhood and adolescence poignantly illustrate the importance of relationships in the lives of females and how much it hurts occurs when relationships are damaged.
Those who are targets of relational aggression endure significant and sometimes devastating outcomes, including reduced rates of peer acceptance; stunted school achievement; and higher rates of peer rejection, internalizing symptoms, feelings of loneliness, and emotional distress Crick and Bigbee, ; Ostrov and Keating, ; Woods and Wolke, ; Johnson and Foster, Further, for those who experience the adjustment problems consequent on being victimized by relational aggression, research predicts the internalizing outcomes of depression, anxiety, loneliness, isolation, and withdrawal Crick and Grotpeter, ; Crick et al.
These are all serious outcomes and it is beneficial for both research and for popular trade-publications to provide accurate and contemporary descriptions of the conditions that can lead to dangerous mental health concerns. If research-based publications are the gold-standard for accuracy against which popular outlets may be measured, then it is clear that popular literature adequately and accurately portrays relational aggression. We trust that the increased awareness of relational aggression that inevitably results from the widespread dissemination by popular literature of information on the topic will help girls and women of all ages to avoid hurtful, relationship-injuring behaviors, and build healthy, supportive relationships with one another.
The authors declare that the research was conducted in the absence of any commercial or financial relationships that could be construed as a potential conflict of interest. Adler, P. Dynamics of inclusion and exclusion in pre-adolescent cliques. CrossRef Full Text. Andreou, E. Social preference, perceived popularity, and social intelligence: relations to overt and relational aggression.
Archer, J. An integrated review of indirect, relational, and social aggression. Barash, S. New York: St. Barnett, M. Eisenberg and J. Bauman, S. Bjorkqvist, K. Do girls manipulate boys and fight?
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Relational aggression, relational victimization, and language development in preschoolers. Bowers, L. Brown, B. Perceptions of peer pressure, peer conformity dispositions, and self-reported behavior among adolescents.
Brown, S. Parenting predictors of relational aggression among Puerto Rican and European American school-age children. Early Child. Burton, B. Casas, J. Cillessen, A. Developmental trajectories of adolescent popularity: a growth curve modeling analysis. Pubmed Abstract Pubmed Full Text. From censure to reinforcement: developmental changes in the association between aggression and social status. Coyne, S. Craig, W M. Observations of bullying in the playground and in the classroom.
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Relationally and physically aggressive children intent attributions and feelings of distress for relational and instrumental peer provocations. A longitudinal study of relational and physical aggression in preschool. Bertstein Lincoln: University of Nebraska Press , 75— Cullerton-Sen, C. Childhood maltreatment and the development of relational and physical aggression: the importance of a gender-informed approach.
Curtner-Smith, M. Child Study J. Dellasega, C. Doyle, H. Relational aggression and child outcomes. Ohio Sch. Ellis, W. Flouri, E. The role of mother involvement and father involvement in adolescent bullying behavior.
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Kuppens, S. Individual and classroom variables associated with relational aggression in elementary-school aged children: a multilevel analysis. LaFontana, K. Lease, A. Messick, J. Producers , and Waters, M. Director Mean Girls [Motion Picture]. Hollywood, CA: Paramount Pictures. Murray-Close, D. A short-term longitudinal study of growth of relational aggression during middle childhood: associations with gender, friendship intimacy, and internalizing problems. Nelson, D. Aversive parenting in china: associations with child physical and relational aggression.
Ostrov, J. Sex Roles 52, — Gender differences in preschool aggression during free play and structured interactions: an observational study. Parkhurst, J. Sociometric popularity and peer-perceived popularity: two distinct dimensions of peer status. Early Adolesc. Pellegrini, A. Relational aggression and relationships in preschoolers: a discussion of methods, gender differences, and function.
Prinstein, M. Overt and relational aggression in adolescents: social-emotional adjustment of aggressors and victims. Rigby, K. Rose, A. In studies of preschoolers, the findings are somewhat less clear. Relational aggression and physical aggression share a number of risk factors, and children who are physically aggressive are more likely to be relationally aggressive Estrem However, children who use only relational aggression tend to have better oral language skills than those who use only physical aggression Estrem Ironically, children who use relational aggression may be among the most competent children in the classroom.
They tend to have well-developed perspective-taking and empathy skills Ostrov et al. Further, young children who use relational aggression effectively may be socially powerful. They are often popular with both peers and teachers Roseth et al. Some preschoolers use both prosocial and aggressive strategies to get what they want in social situations, suggesting that young children can have a number of social tools at their disposal Roseth et al.
The role of the early educator, then, is to help children learn to choose prosocial tools. By treating all children with respect, teachers model prosocial strategies.
Careful monitoring especially during unstructured times, such as snack and mealtimes allows early educators to teach prosocial strategies directly. When they hear a child say something unkind, teachers can use the opportunity to teach more positive interaction skills.
Michael, a 3-year-old in a mixed-age classroom, is throwing blocks at the shelves in the construction center. Farrah, their teacher, is standing close by. A number of researchers describe the prosocial functions of relational aggression. Children who are highly socially competent often use relational aggression to reinforce social norms, many of which are endorsed by teachers and other adults Coyne et al.
As demonstrated in the vignette above, teachers and other adults may, consciously or unconsciously, reinforce relational aggression among young children because they do not realize they are doing so or because it helps preserve the social order. Given the risks for children who use relational aggression and their targets, helping children find alternatives to relational aggression as early as possible should be a priority for preschool educators.
For example, in a study of elementary classrooms Kuppens and colleagues found that when a teacher tolerates relational aggression, children who tend to be aggressive are more likely to act aggressively, both relationally and physically.
Kuppens and colleagues refer to the norms of the classroom with respect to aggression in general and postulate that when aggression, either relational or physical, is part of the classroom norm, more children will adopt aggressive behavior. Helping children find alternatives to relational aggression as early as possible should be a priority for preschool educators.
We suspect that very few, if any, preschool teachers would say that aggression is an acceptable way for children to solve their social problems. Goldstein and colleagues found that when children saw that aggression led to a positive outcome for the aggressor, they were more likely to engage in aggression themselves.
However, when the consequence of aggression was negative, children were less likely to use aggression to get what they want. Like physical aggression, relational aggression is a common behavior among young children.
Why would you let them hurt each other emotionally? Because a positive classroom climate is one of the most important elements of preventing relational aggression Kuppens et al.
It is important for teachers to consider the role of relational aggression in the classroom: when it occurs and under what circumstances e. Which children need to win? Margie Donnely, who teaches kindergarten at PK Yonge Developmental Research School in Gainesville, Florida, describes the importance of learning the classroom dynamics early in the school year. When teachers model respect and affection for everyone in the class, children are more likely to engage in inclusive, positive play.
For example, Margie has a classroom rule that if children want to hand out birthday party invitations at school, every child must receive one.
For example, Margie teaches children to try to resolve conflicts before they bring the dispute to her. Margie and Heather both point out that teachers can have tremendous influence over how children respond to their peers. Heather points out that, particularly for younger children, narrating interactions in the moment can help children learn social skills. Sara pulls back, looking angry.
Games and classroom activities can encourage or discourage aggression. As much as possible, choose games and activities that encourage cooperation e.
Paley describes her own efforts to make sure that all children were included in play. They found that having the rule encouraged children to report that they liked more of their peers, but the children also reported increased levels of social dissatisfaction, suggesting that always having to play with everyone made playing less fun.
Direct social skills instruction was necessary in kindergarten. Clearly, one of the most important teaching tasks for early educators is helping children learn how to engage positively with peers. Mindess, Chen, and Brenner point out the need for a carefully planned, comprehensive social-emotional curriculum developed by the school, or commercially available curricula , ideally implemented schoolwide and communicated to other school staff and parents, to prevent relational and physical aggression.
If relational aggression is already a pattern for a child, strategies intended for the entire class may not be enough.
A social problem-solving model—a component of many published curricula—systematically teaches children to think through social situations as problems to be solved through brainstorming solutions, and evaluating what-if scenarios. Explicit instruction about how to handle social situations is helpful. For social skills instruction to be successful in reducing pervasive relational aggression, it is important for teachers to embed the principles throughout daily activities.
Routines such as morning meeting provide rich opportunities to build community and to teach and model respect for others. The impact of relational aggression across the lifespan highlights the importance of teaching young children alternatives to all forms of aggression. By being aware of ourselves and our responses to relational aggression, understanding the children we teach, and implementing systematic strategies to encourage community and prosocial problem solving, early educators can help all children learn critical social and emotional skills in order to experience fulfilling relationships.
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